In the Wilderness of Identity (Matthew 4:1-11)

Every year, as Lent begins, the Church leads us into the wilderness with Jesus through the story in the Gospel of Matthew 4:1–11. We often speak of three temptations, but beneath the three lies a fourth temptation - the one that runs through them all. The temptation to doubt who he is. “If you are the Son of God…” Those words echo not only in the wilderness but later at the cross: “If you are the Son of God, come down.” The question is between Jesus and himself. The primary temptation we all face is to doubt our divine identity. The evil one does not need to make us evil; he only needs to make us unsure of who we are.

 

The first temptation is about misusing power. It is the temptation to prove ourselves by being spectacular, impressive, important. We want to be noticed. We want to do something extraordinary so that others will see us and say, “You matter.” But Jesus refuses. He will not use power to prove his worth. The second temptation is about misusing religion. It is the temptation to play games with God. To make faith transactional instead of transformational. “If I do this, God must do that.” But Jesus refuses to manipulate the Father’s love. He will not turn trust into a spectacle. The third temptation is the temptation to secure identity through control and dominance. Power itself is not evil. There must be ways to use it for good. But until we are tested, and until we no longer need power to validate ourselves, we will almost always misuse it. If we are not grounded in who we are, we will end up worshiping power just to have it.

 

The fourth temptation is universal. Our greatest struggles are between us and ourselves. Before I betray you, I betray myself. Before I compromise outwardly, I disconnect inwardly. How often have we tried to turn stones into bread - not literally, but by trying to prove ourselves? How often have we thrown ourselves from emotional pinnacles, testing whether we are truly loved? How often have we bowed to lesser powers in exchange for approval, recognition, or security? we are tempted daily to prove we are enough. Temptations reveal where we are hungry. They uncover our wounds. They show us where we seek validation, where we grasp for control, where we doubt, we are loved. They are diagnostic. They can become doorways to healing. When we are in touch with our deepest identity and value, we remain true to ourselves. When we lose touch with that identity, we betray ourselves.

 

The wilderness is an initiation. It teaches us to clarify who we are and whose we are. It invites us to ask: What are my temptations teaching me about myself? It would be tempting to say, “Well, he’s Jesus.” As if he had an advantage we do not. But that too is a subtle betrayal. What if we approached our temptations as invitations to deeper self-knowledge and wholeness? What if every temptation became a moment to remember: I am beloved. So, this Lent, let us not waste a good temptation. Let us enter the wilderness honestly. Let us listen to what our struggles reveal.

 

- Lilly Pushpam PBVM